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I'm not dead

contrary to popular belief, i am not dead.

in other news, i wish i could just throw everything away and buy new things. i hate moving. i hate packing. i hate unpacking. i hate too much.

im probably gonig to hell.

my hair looks like a crooked mess today and i have no real joy in seeing it flip this way and that way. someone please... give me a stylist.

im done. back to the blogspot. oops i mean work.
i figure i should all direct your smarmy asses (smarmy... new favorite evil word hehehe) over to my regular blog that does work now. the livejournal is my backup.

don't hate me because im ... well just don't hate me. lol

www.spooninmyeye.blogspot.com

Yasamin

The Exploding BBQ

Being hispanic and well... American, BBQing is a huge part of my life. well... it was. not really anymore. The reason for that is because nickster and I have been living in the same apartment complex for 2 years now and have realized that we can't, for the life of us, figure out how to use the crappy little BBQ's set out for residents.

Once we attempted it. Actually nickster and paul (his bro) tried it. Mind you, Nick's got 4 brothers and a very compitent cousin. All were able to work the pits at the last place we lived at. This time, not so much. I planned a July 4th BBQ 2 years ago. it was out first summer BBQ in the new place and we invited Sherry and Paul to enjoy the festivities with us. It was to consist of BBQ burgers and hotdogs, swimming, drinking, more swimming, soaking in a hot tub, more drinking, until we were pretty much drunk.

Sherry and Paul arrive and I've got everything ready to go for the guys to start the BBQ. Sherry starts mixin drinks and all seems to be goin well. Nick and Paul head out to the BBQ while Sherry and I meander in the apartment, watchin the new bigscreen we got and laughin it up. 10 minutes later, the guys come back in with uncooked burgers, and sad faces. it seems that they couldnt figure out how to use the pits. They set the food down and we start to deliberate.

KABOOM!!!!

A loud blast rocks the complex. The guys freak out and run for the pit, thinkin they left something on and blew up the pool area. we all screamed and did alot of scrambling. After a few moments, we realize it was just some kids with fireworks, screwin around.

After calming down, drinking a little more and much deliberating, we ended up George Foreman Grillin' those puppies. stupid ass grills. to this day, we won't touch the grills in fear of blowin up the complex. That's all we need is for some stupid mistake to happen, the complex blows up and we all get arrested for being terrorists. hah! just my luck right?

Well luckily we had the Foreman Grill, so we ate well, drank well, and did some rockin swimming. Talk about a great July 4th.

Next time... I'll tell you the story of the hoochie mamma neighbor with the giant hoohaw that wouldn't go away.

Tarots


You are Strength


Courage, strength, fortitude. Power not arrested in the act of judgement, but passing on to further action, sometimes obstinacy.


This is a card of courage and energy. It represents both the Lion's hot, roaring energy, and the Maiden's steadfast will. The innocent Maiden is unafraid, undaunted, and indomitable. In some cards she opens the lion's mouth, in others she shuts it. Either way, she proves that inner strength is more powerful than raw physical strength. That forces can be controlled and used to score a victory is very close to the message of the Chariot, which might be why, in some decks, it is Justice that is card 8 instead of Strength. With strength you can control not only the situation, but yourself. It is a card about anger and impulse management, about creative answers, leadership and maintaining one's personal honor. It can also stand for a steadfast friend.


What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.



when I was 14, I felt lost. I felt confused. My mother, and i both being raised catholic, started to shop at metaphysical and mystical shops, mostly out of curiosity for me, mostly out of the search of peace for my mtoher. we both started to turn toward a belief much older then christianity. when i was 16, a friend turned me back to Catholocism. I know now that i didn't do it because I believed in their religious hierarchy. At first I did it to belong to something. anything would have done nicely. Then i continued because i loved working in the soup kitchen and helping the homeless. Things changed though. The politics of religion wouldn't allow me to continue without being fully confirmed as catholic and I just couldn't do it. when i left the second half of my junior year due to a nervous breakdown, my mother bought me my first true deck of Tarots. Tarot of the Moon Garden is what she bought me.

everyone interprets the cards differently. I started to study the books that she bought me with a sheer determination to learn something different. My own great grandmother used to read tarot but not with these fancy decks they have now... no. She read with a plain old card deck. I knew what my family history was. I knew there were brujas in my past. yet i played like a child with the cards. I studied them until i could read them without turning to the books.

then one day... something in me changed. a door opened that would change my life. I started to see the cards more clearly then ever before. i read them in comletely different patterns than what the books were telling me. AND EVERY SINGLE TIME I READ THEM, I WAS RIGHT. I took them to school and became a reader, for free, for classmates. at first, they thought it was a joke. a fun little game. until they realized that i was predicting things that no one could possibly know. everything from scores on tests to cheating boyfriends to death and life.

People who were complete skeptics were coming to me in secresy for help with problems they couldn't solve on their own. people who needed to see issues with a fresh pair of eyes...

I did what i could, always for free, always being dead honest. I was never wrong. I always warned them that what i say is a path they are on.. and it is truly up to them to change that path.

when i was 19 years old, i was engaged to a real bastard of a man. he found my beloved cards. He threw them away. I have never been able to successfully pick up another deck again. My mother has since bought me another of the same deck, and yet, it only brings back the memory of him telling me i was going to hell for my sins.

funny how he said that. he cheated on me. who's goin to hell now pal?!

My mother has since gone back to a christian based belief, but she still holds true to the old rituals that both her and i learned from others. she bleses the house with sage and salt. she lights her candles and sets her circle. she believes heavily in angels, let alone, nymphs, fairies, elves, and all sorts of little garden residents. After years of searching for something that made her feel safe, she had to create her own type of religious belief, one that mixes the old with the new and allows us to believe what we want, without fear.

ps. i didnt quite like the first card they issued me, considering that it has always been my flag card. the card that will always represent your true soul. but the style did not call to me. so i did it again.. and this lovely little card is what i came up with.


You are Strength


Courage, strength, fortitude. Power not arrested in the act of judgement, but passing on to further action, sometimes obstinacy.


This is a card of courage and energy. It represents both the Lion's hot, roaring energy, and the Maiden's steadfast will. The innocent Maiden is unafraid, undaunted, and indomitable. In some cards she opens the lion's mouth, in others she shuts it. Either way, she proves that inner strength is more powerful than raw physical strength. That forces can be controlled and used to score a victory is very close to the message of the Chariot, which might be why, in some decks, it is Justice that is card 8 instead of Strength. With strength you can control not only the situation, but yourself. It is a card about anger and impulse management, about creative answers, leadership and maintaining one's personal honor. It can also stand for a steadfast friend.


What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.

YES!

ATTENTION ALL WHO CARE!!!


I called and they told me that we got it! all we have to do is come up with the $1000.00 down!!! and i know we can do that!

well... techincally we are screwed but damnit i know i can find a way to come up with this money! I have to find a way! you have no idea how important it is that we find a freaking way!!!

*Prepares to take a stroll down Van Buren if necessary*

so just when i thought the stressing was over... most stress has come up. but its okay!!! because we qualified for the place of my current dreams and damnit i will find a way if i have to sell someone elses soul! lol

thank you to all who said prayers. thank you to all who cared enough to drop lines about this and wish us good luck. you are all awesome!!!

I also have stuff up on ebay that i'm selling (everything!) to not only make room but to make money. lol wish me luck my sugar plum psychos!

Freaking Nonexistant Alarm Clock.

so this weekend wasn't much of a super psyched out weekend. yesterday was a hell of a day for football and my chargers eeked out another win spanking the broncos like we was their momma's. okay that was ghetto. lol

this morning i woke up to Nick screamin "OH MY GOD ITS ALREADY 6:34AM!" which made me fly outta bed like a freaking rocket on a mission! i went from deep sleep to praying mantis and ready for battle in 2 seconds flat. He doesnt know whether he set the alarm or not. I think he did he just got up, turned it off and went back to bed.

Do you know what this means? its time for a new alarm peoples! this old one is pretty much nonexistant. it gave me the fright of a lifetime as i tried to control the urges to start KUNG FUU-ing things in the house. so i was late to work this morning and i have a shitload to do. did you all miss me? hell, i missed me. lol

Finally something for you all to giggle at. Katie MacAlister is a great writer but even better, shes a great quickie blogger. her friday post always has a website to check out, as her monday post always has half nakedness to drool over. lol So, check out last friday's website and have fun makin Santa Dance.
CLICK HERE SUCKAS!

Pray For My CONDO!!!

Nickster and I are attempting to rent a condo in lovely Ahwatukee AZ (google it). Its absolutely beautiful. wanna see???

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tell me thats not hot!!

and the coolest part.. the view is not only of the pool... but of the entire city of Ahwatukee because the damned thing sits high up on a hill!!! well.. not too high. lol its absolutely beautiful.

you walk in the front door to face straight across another door. thats your garage. its under the apartment. you immediately take a flight of carpetted stairs up to the actual apartment. You take the last step and the room opens out to a lovely dining room to your right and a massive kitchen to your left. if you keep walking straight you enter the large living room area. its lovely! there is a fireplace and a small balcony to sit and enjoy the stars at night!! stare down at the pool... stare over the valley... god its beautiful. Now you have a choice. the Master bedroom is on the left. you enter the door and its a whopper of a room! i can actually consider buying real bedroom sets! a whole bed frame! lol Hell i can even consider a King sized bed now! lol the closet is huge! massive! whopping! wow!!! with a built in shelving for... my shoes!!! yay!!!! the bathroom... okay this is where i thought i was going to cry. the bathroom is absolutely beautiful. its a 2 sink bathroom that nice and roomy. and to top it all off... there is a ROMAN TUB!!!!! i can finally take a bath without feeling like my ass is stuck between a rock and a hard place! (thats the sides of the bathtub at my old place you bunch of sickos.) The other room is also nice and large! with another walk in closet and a seperate bathroom!
*cries*

so there's that. say a prayer for us because we need it!

God I'm So Hot!

this is supposedly me as a sportscar. I actually think its a perfect match... except for one detail. I think YELLOW CARS are absolutely ugly! eewwww! So, I found other colors. hehehe

I'm a Lamborghini Murcielago!



You're not subtle, but you don't want to be. Fast, loud, and dramatic, you want people to notice you, and then get out of the way. In a world full of sheep, you're a raging bull.

Take the Which Sports Car Are You? quiz.



Here I am in the all essential black, every woman should have that little black ... paint job??? lol
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and here I am in green, its not my favorite color here but its perfect for spring.
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Here is me in lovely Candy Apple (Cherry Bomb, Fire Engine, Flaming, etc) Red. This is a color strictly to tease. hehehe
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and last but not least, my absolute fave, Here I am in lovely Baby Blue. Tell me I'm not dead sexy in baby freaking blue!!!
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haha freaking sheltered people.

today as i paruzed the blogs that i can post on during the day, i came across Laaw-Yuhr's Adventures in Self Loathing blog . This newspaper clipping was posted and, after i read it, i laughed till tears fell down my face. Damn did i need it because I am so NOT a morning person. lol I felt like utter poopaki this morning. So take a look, and tell me what you think.

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Now that that's all over with, first and foremost, this woman is so sheltered that she has no idea what Camel Toe is. MY MOTHER KNOWS WHAT CAMEL TOE IS!!!! MY ABUELITA KNOWS WHAT CAMEL TOE IS!!!

secondly camel toe is a gross look to go with. it screams "Hello, I have a yeast infection. Would you like to see?" eeewwwwww!!! talk about cuttin off the blood supply. I have no idea why women buy pants that are too small for them. Not only do they look gross, but it causes great laughter from me when i see it.

Its the same thing as women who where pants that ride up the ass crack!!! how can the seems of your thick ass jeans be comfy up into your ass crack? we call that hungry butt. "is your butt hungry? cuz its pretty much eatin up your pants."

yeah. sick lookin seriously people.

and you think your too pretty for this stuff to matter? ass eaten jeans is sexy on no one. NO ONE!!! camel toe would make me laugh at the most socially beautiful woman in the world. trust me. i have laughed!

Please by all means feed your nether regions something other then your clothing. if you like the fel of cloth painfully rubbing up againts your Ah- noose or your cho cho may i recommend buying a thong two sizes too small???

and ladies... sometimes going comando is good for you. cant keep that thing under lock and key forever!!! but watch out for cameras. As Lohan and Spears has learned snatches arent pretty. they are called beef curtains for a reason.

eeeeeewwwwwww!!! now that i have utterly grossed myself out with the flash in my mind of lohan's snatch in that one pic. good god. it looked like a freaking beat up Croissant!

okay im done. i'll rant more later.

How High?

"We never know how high we are,
Till we are called to rise;
And then, if we are true to plan,
Our statures touch the skies"


Emily Dickenson

I would love to say that I learned this from reading her outstanding writings, but in fact I got it from the bottom of my Celestial Seasonings box of Sugar Plum Spice tea bags. lol

I'm so learned.

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